In the last months since Todd has been gone I have been focusing on my writing and trying to get the stuff typed up so that my new editor can get my stuff gone through. I have two appointments tomorrow and time in between them so I can work on getting more typed up. I won’t lie I do still miss Todd and wish that he was in my life.
There are days at work just being there kills me inside because we aren’t friends anymore. I have support at work but it doesn’t change what our current state is. I have memories that I don’t want to let go of but it doesn’t bring him back either. People say that I am better off without him. I have slowly started to let go despite what my heart says.
I am putting forth the effort to fix my marriage but it doesn’t get fixed over night. I still hurt and there are still things that I won’t let go of. I’m focusing on my job.